Starting this website feels a lot like starting to run. I strongly disliked running. At the beginning, I didn't know how to pace myself. I would run too far or too hard. I'd allow my heart rate to get too high. I'd feel exhausted and sick, and I wouldn't run again for weeks or months or until my memory of the pain had faded. Nearly 8 months later, I'm still not fast. I still tire easily. I can't run for any great distance. But I can get up, put on my shoes, and get out the door. I no longer dread it. If I'm not careful, I might start to enjoy it soon. Some days I'm too tired or lazy to run, but I get out the door anyway and go for a nice walk. I'm building consistency. I believe in the compounding benefits of regular exercise even if I haven't seen huge results yet.
Ever since I decided to develop my ability to think well through writing, I've been discovering just how much effort that requires. This post isn't going to be that great, and it's not coming very easily. I'm working on a real essay. I spent many hours on it this week, but I didn't finish it. I only made it half way through the second draft. I'm not rushing it. I want the essay to be well-written. I want it to be thoughtful and flow well. Honestly, I want to be proud of it, even if I'm the only person who ever reads it.
I'm sick of thinking about creating. I want to actually create. So here I am. Putting some words out. Issuing an update on my painfully slow progress. And you know what? It feels good.